another moving ahead kind of post

london is baking at 25 degrees in the shade. i'm wilting, and people are wondering how i lived in delhi for 23 years solid. i was too, then realised that i was probably always wilty in delhi (as opposed to the glowy bright london hottie i am now)... praps there's some scandinavian blood somewhere. which great grandparent got naughty with stefan or olga etc etc...
the weeks are just RUSHING by. i need another cambridge-type experience to be rejuvenated enough to pick out the finer points of each day, each happy hour etc.
i am going to this conference next week, which is proving to be the bane of my existence. besides taking up a lot of time that i don't have, it's forcing me to wear my bad side outdoors. butterflies in tummy do a bitch-cum-whineball of wendigo make.
more confession - i've been ditching people left right and centre. sometimes all i want is to sit somewhere outdoors, where it's cool, even cold, and have time to think, and to breathe; so having people with you is not very conducive to that.
i want to be alone, really. like, mentally alone, non-dependent on others' opinions, their love or admiration for me. a happy hard alone.
ugh, sounds like i'm hurting or something. who knows?