the sun never sets on the british empire
Should I be ashamed of being a colonial at heart? Or should i be proud of the Lutyen's Delhi bungalow up-bringing, the high standard of education, the intimacy with the ayahs of my childhood - she's really clean you know!
Should I be afraid to admit that when the Raj was over, there were the higher echelons of Indian civil servants to take their place, to produce and reproduce the inequalities that we all lived with, happily and unquestioningly, a bunch of brown sahibs playing squash in the Gymkhana?
Should I be proud of the grandfather who threw bombs at the British, got imprisoned; the grandmother who disguised herself in a burkha to carry tiffin to her lover under the watchful eyes of many subedars?
Should I be thankful to the other grandfather whose indifference to the oppressor gave me, in legacy, a sunny childhood, in a colony of many low hedges and no walls, a place that now comes to mind when I wait for night buses on Abbey Road; the assurance that my mother only had to say the word and the maid-servant would leave her children in the servant's quarter, bawling or shitting, and come change my dress;
A childhood full of the firm belief that I am superior to many that I interact with daily, because I know the meaning of 'extempore', sing in the choir in carmel convent school, and am going to go to vilayt/bilayt one day, as the only logical conclusion to my tale of extraordinary-ness in this ordinary, suffering, dusty country.
Should I be afraid to admit that when the Raj was over, there were the higher echelons of Indian civil servants to take their place, to produce and reproduce the inequalities that we all lived with, happily and unquestioningly, a bunch of brown sahibs playing squash in the Gymkhana?
Should I be proud of the grandfather who threw bombs at the British, got imprisoned; the grandmother who disguised herself in a burkha to carry tiffin to her lover under the watchful eyes of many subedars?
Should I be thankful to the other grandfather whose indifference to the oppressor gave me, in legacy, a sunny childhood, in a colony of many low hedges and no walls, a place that now comes to mind when I wait for night buses on Abbey Road; the assurance that my mother only had to say the word and the maid-servant would leave her children in the servant's quarter, bawling or shitting, and come change my dress;
A childhood full of the firm belief that I am superior to many that I interact with daily, because I know the meaning of 'extempore', sing in the choir in carmel convent school, and am going to go to vilayt/bilayt one day, as the only logical conclusion to my tale of extraordinary-ness in this ordinary, suffering, dusty country.
Comments
I suppose that having started with my wrong foot, it is rather awkward, and to some extent even prideswallowingly painful, to post any comment that might seem or be conciliatory. But, hey, maybe I do have my right foot exactly where it belongs – just as you guessed – and maybe this soundly accounts for all lack of reason or rhyme. Taken all in all for what this unnecessary, and maybe unwelcome, comment is truly worth, I trust you will arrive at “I read your post and I liked it” and discard the rest. So, again,
Bravo!
PS. I forgot the anonymity bit. You may vituperate me at anaragmb0@yahoo.com
"i read your post and i liked it"
really,
tk cr
winegod - thanks, i think.
suhail - welcome, kya haal chal, and thanks.
Carpe Diem Word Verification: Jhptos
saw ur other blog,nice too
Gald U recognised it...and as they say...
"Jindigi jeene ke 2 tarrikke hote hein..."
i really like the way u write
thanks sorabh
devesh, aapka comment kuch samajh nahin aaya. unless it was about inky's comment.
You'd be surprised by the family of the collector that stays in the flat below ours.
I'd be grateful to the first grandfather for the spirit he bestowed, but instinct tells me the other grandfather would be extremely beneficial to my financial wellbeing. ;-)
PS: just in case you thought I was being flippant, one grandpop of mine worked as an Education Secty for the Kingdom of Travancore, while the other fervently hated the Brits, but still ended up a Director in General Motors India. :-)) And no, both didn't leave enough money for me to be based in the honeyed lands of Bilayat.