christmas list

rebelled against the 9 to 5 workplace on friday and went for christmas lunch (which was disguised as a meeting) at the saturday job headquarters. i love them there. they appreciate good work, don't have crazy insecurities, soothe my permit-related insecurities, have a great sense of humour and good choice in salmon. stayed there for the rest of the day saying nyaaah to the work piling up at the 9 to 5. i don't feel particularly responsible about it anymore.. wonder why... praps because they stabbed me in the back? (oo dramatic)

saturday was lazy and gloomy at home with the tv and the distracted mind. i can't be alone at home right now. when i'm there i feel like meeting people but as soon as i make a date i feel like hiding in bed and if i'm actually out i feel like ditching people and escaping. nutjob.

sunday, i had a lovely walk, a lovely time and made a new friend. but praps i lost him afterwards. the ending was a slightly surreal experience.

sunday eve, christmas eve, midnight mass with a believer, blessings and frankincense in a well kept, organised church in the wealthy parish that i lurk in as a foreigner and lodger. i felt guilty for not going to a temple at diwali, but the fake durga puja at camden town centre was scarily ghettoish enough. i'd love to go to a real temple if they had one hereabouts, where i'd be free to believe and practice my hindu-ness in my own way.

monday is christmas day and i'm sharing a lovely cosy lunch with a friend at her place. the day has already involved christmas traditions like opening presents, eating, watching christmas movies and so on. yummy.

next post should be about resolutions maybe?